So, it just hit me, I am MOVING to another country, its not a vacation, its not a two-week visit to see my hunny, its not a study abroad summer, nope I am moving. After speaking to some fellow expats and reading some really great books on becoming an expat (will post links to those) I have learned there are various phases of emotions that most expats experience. I think now that most of the planning is done and the items that were out of my control are now in control, it has all hit me. I was driving the other night and thought to myself "what the hell are you doing?!" Don't get me wrong now, its soooo exciting to be moving with my fiance to England. Its great to know we can explore Europe together, AND work while we're there, but there is so much I am going to miss here.
I'll miss being so close to my family, I'll miss knowing they are only a short drive away from me (even if i don't make that short drive as often as i should). I'll miss my friends, we may not see each other or hang out as much as we used to or as much as we want to, but we understand that life-changes do change our lives - but we are there for each other whenever needed, no matter what!
I'll miss my glam squad!!! Where the heck am I going to get my hair done? Who will do my mani/pedis? Will I find a good spa and esthetician? And whose gonna be my shopping gal-pal?
I'll miss my favorite restaurants, I have quickly discovered the food in UK is not quite what I am used to. I'll miss my gym and my spin class and my spin BFF (hey Jocelyn!).
I'll miss this house so much. It has truly become our home, no matter where he has been stationed - this has always been home. This was OUR first home, we decorated, maintained it, and loved it. We got engaged in this house, we spent time with our families in this house. And while its still ours, we are becoming landlords and another family will be living here soon - we won't be coming to 3067 when we come back to NC to visit....
So many things I will miss and truly I asked myself WTF are you doing...what am I doing? Really?
I am following my heart. I just realized something... I WILL be with my family and my best friend - he is there waiting for me!!! I am going to see the world, experience life and have an awesome story to tell our kids - and I get to do it all with my favorite person in the whole wide world.
yeah, I am a lucky girl...
All completely natural feelings and just allow yourself to take time to settle into them all. You will have days when you hate where you are and days where you can't believe you didn't up and move sooner.
ReplyDeleteIt's all part of the ride an I'm glad you are willing to share it with us. :)
Allyson, I spent many long days and nights pondering the same questions, but from my selfish view; not wanting my baby to be so far away for so long. Eventually (you know I'm slow) I got to the point that it made so much sense and seemed so right that you are following your dreams. When we had a chance to spend time together before you left, I shared a story of regret that I had for not following a dream of mine. I did okay, but that regret and question will always be with me. I'm glad that you are not making a similar mistake. Live your life to the fullest with no regrets, but I admire you because that is exactly what you do.
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